Week 2.

Here are five of my favorite photos from this past week.

Day 5

Day 6

Day 8

Day 11

Day 12

Hospital pictures.

I had no idea that hospital photos are so artsy nowadays. I always thought they lined up babies and did mugshot type photos in the nursery. Not the case.

These were done some time on March 1, the day after Joe was born. I have very little recollection of any of this happening. You can probably tell by how awesome I look. Please note they made me move my gown to look like I was topless. I was not. I have no idea why they do that or why I agreed. I guess I was on serious pain meds and highly suggestible.

Also of note, it was our quasi wedding anniversary. Since we got married on February 29, 2012, we planned to celebrate it on March 1. Clay spent our anniversary cleaning meconium off Joe's bum, and I spent the day alternately trying to feed Joe and pushing the button on the demerol pain pump. We'll have to do a make up date, I think.

On a more positive note, the blue blanket on Joe in these pictures was Clay's baby blanket that his MawMaw Alma had made for him. Ms. Gayle brought it to us, and we're so grateful she did!

We did get some professional photos at our home last Friday, too. Those should be available in a few weeks. For now, here is Baby Joe at one day old.

For those trying to figure out who he looks like...he has my nose, Clay's mouth, jury's out on the eyes (he has the slightly lazy left eye like me, but they're blue in color like Clay - for now anyway). His hands and feet are very large compared to the rest of his tiny self.

Joe's arrival.

Birth Story – Baby Joe

February 28, 2013

For the first eight months, I had a really uneventful pregnancy. I didn’t have morning sickness or terrible fatigue. I was mostly just hungry and cranky, which isn’t too different from my usual demeanor. I started exploring birth options early on in the pregnancy, and it was my hope to have a natural unmedicated birth at the hospital. Dr. P supported this plan, and my husband and I hired a doula to support us. I prepared the best I could for this…books, hypnobabies, chiropractor visits, etc. I felt confident I could do it.

At my 34 week (2/8) appointment, my blood pressure measured high for the first time. I also had some early signs of pre-eclampsia. At the subsequent appointment, my blood pressure stayed high, so we picked up the visits to two per week. I also had lots of other tests done to make sure there wasn't anything worse going on. I was put on "rest at home" on 2/15, but I was still able to work. 

Dr. P expressed concern, because even though my other test results were ok, there is an increased risk of problems with the placenta when you have high blood pressure.  She said Joe would likely need to join us around week 38.  Knowing first babies don’t often come on their own at week 38, my hopes for a natural unmedicated birth were dashed.

I had a growth ultrasound on 2/22 and another follow-up with Dr. P. At the time, they said Joe was measuring around 7 lbs., and his organs looked good. At the follow-up, Dr. P scheduled the induction to begin the evening of 2/27, about 37 weeks gestation. I know there are probably some people who would have refused the induction, but I was less concerned about adhering to my ideal birth plan and focused more on baby Joe’s safety. Dr. P said it was the best thing for Joe. 

I wasn't ready to head out on maternity leave yet, so I worked like crazy to tie up as many tasks as I could between 2/22 and 2/26. Then I spent Wednesday 2/27 mentally and physically preparing for the induction. I had one last chiropractor visit, a prenatal massage, and finished packing the hospital bag.

My instructions said to expect a call from the hospital between 5 and 6 pm to tell me what time to arrive at the hospital. That time came and went, so I called the L&D check in. They said that all beds were full and to call back at 7:30. I did, and all beds were full at that time also. Then, they asked me to call back at 9:30. At this point, I was exhausted from the day, and I took a nap. Clay woke me at 9:30, and I called L&D. They asked when we could be there, and I said, “10 PM.” They said, “See you then!” And we were on our way…

Expanded Mel - Max Capacity. 37 w 4 d.

We arrived at the hospital at about 10 PM, and checked in with security and headed to the L&D floor of the hospital. At the nurses’ station, we met our nurse for the night. We showed her our revised birth plan, and she was confident she could help us meet those goals for the night anyway. She put in a hep lock (instead of an IV), and started some of the induction medicine 11 PM. Around 2 AM (2/28), I was startled awake by some nurses who were asking me to roll on my side, and they inserted the IV into the hep lock. Joe’s heart rate had dropped pretty significantly with a long contraction, so they needed to intervene. Overnight, my contractions were pretty regular – about one minute long with 3 minutes in between them.

Dr. P arrived at 0800 and checked me, but very little progress had been made. The day nurse, J, came in and asked if I needed anything for pain. I said, “No, ma’am,” and they started a different medicine, Pitocin, at 10 AM. She transferred my care to a second nurse, A, who was fantastic, supportive, and kind. My doula (L) arrived late morning, and assisted me with some early labor coping techniques. I had to alternate between the bed and the birthing (yoga) ball, because my blood pressure would increase when I got out of bed. The contractions felt awful in bed, so I wanted to spend as much time on the ball as possible. The nurses increased the Pitocin throughout the morning, and my contractions started to increase in intensity.

At least the popsicles weren't sugar-free.

Dr. P arrived at noon and asked to check me. I was discouraged, and I told her I didn’t think there could be much progress, because I wasn’t feeling anything more than menstrual cramps. She said we have three options: 1) do another round of cervidil overnight on 2/28, or 2) continue with increased Pitocin if signs indicated it was working, or 3) do a c-section. At that point, I consented to the check, and it showed I actually had made progress! This brightened my spirits (as did the multi-fruit popiscles A kept bringing me). So we continued on our journey with increased Pitocin. I was still able to cope without any medication for pain.  Ms. Gayle (Clay’s mom) arrived at about 12:30, and it was great to see her. 

At 2:30, Dr. P came back, and asked to break my water. She said it may help Joe descend, as he was stuck at -3 station. I consented, but Joe didn’t comply. Instead of descending, his head actually moved up in the canal. Dr. P thought this was odd. From this point on, I spent most of my time on the birthing ball. I felt the contractions more, and they became longer with shorter periods of rest throughout the afternoon. I had some nausea, and L provided some peppermint oil to help combat it. That totally worked. I need to have some of that at the house!  

Dr. P came back at about 5 PM, and noted that she had to go home for a little while, and Dr. L would see me at 8:30 PM. Because of the BP and his lack of progress in moving down, she said that at 8:30, we would make a decision on how to proceed. If he didn’t move from -3 station in this window of time, he was unlikely to do so on his own. Because I had to be continuously monitored on the Pitocin, I couldn’t move too far from the bed. I did have an area to move between the bathroom and my bed and I was free to use the ball. I did every exercise I could feasibly do to try to help him move down.

Contraction pain worsened through the afternoon, and by 5:30 PM, I found it difficult to speak during them. For pain management, I continued using the birthing ball. I also was more comfortable standing and rocking through contractions while Clay or L applied counterpressure to my lower back. L also applied some essential oils to my back to help relax the muscles. I tried singing and listening to music, too. All of it made the pain more bearable. The one place that I didn’t enjoy was the bed. I couldn’t get comfortable at all. When I had to lay down for BP checks, the pain was incredible. I resolved to stay out of bed as much as possible. Ms. G monitored the start and end time for each contraction. 

As the Pitocin was increased, the contractions got longer and stronger. There was a shift change at 7, and I got a new nurse. She asked why I wasn’t on the 15 minute BP monitor, and she made me get into bed for a while. Also, she noted Joe’s heartbeat was decelerating a bit more than usual with each contraction. The contractions in bed were horrible, and I started talking crazy. I kept muttering how much I hated the bed. After the nurse left, I told Clay I didn’t like her. He told me that she turned down the Pitocin drip from 26 to 22, and I said, “Ok, I like her.”

After a little bit, I got back out of the bed, and tried to keep the monitor still enough to be allowed to stay there. The birthing ball was no longer comforting, and I stood through most of the contractions between 7:30 and 8:30 PM. With each contraction, I tensed my shoulders, and Clay and L had to remind me to breathe deeply through them and relax my shoulders. It helped to know there was relief in between, but that window became much shorter. The contractions were on top of each other, and I didn’t think I could do it without pain medicine for much longer. 

Dr. L arrived to check me, and I was relieved. I told myself I could make it to 8:30 without pain meds, and I made it. I was confident that I had made some progress, because all that pain had to be for something, right? Wrong. I had made a small amount of progress, but he was still stuck at -3. Kid wasn’t moving. Dr. L recommended a Cesarean section, and I consented. I had a good hearty cry about it while waiting for Dr. P. The anesthesiologist, Dr. O, came by and let me know what to expect for the epidural/spinal. The nurse turned off the Pitocin drip, but I still had some wicked contractions. Those were the worst ones – the ones that I knew weren’t doing anything. 

Within a half hour, I was being wheeled to the operating room, and Clay was given a giant blue gown and two masks – one for his mouth and one for his beard. I was given the epidural in the OR, and prepped for surgery.  I did feel pressure at some points, but it wasn’t painful at all. The one thing I did notice was that I was freezing cold, shaking, and my teeth chattered nonstop. 

Joseph Carroll W. at 9:51 PM, Feb 28.

Clay was brought into the OR after the surgery began. I was lying on my back and he could only see my head and arms. At 9:50, Clay was told to get the camera ready, and that he would be allowed to take some photos. I heard Dr. P say, “Oh, he’s just a little guy,” and, “Wow, he’s cone-headed.”

Our son, Joseph Carroll W., was born at 9:51 PM. He let out a good cry, and Clay and I both cried, too. Clay said, “He’s beautiful.” They held him up for me to see. Clay took some pictures, hugged me, and went with Joe for his monitoring and cleanup. He weighed 5 pounds 13 ounces.

At about 10:15, Clay and Joe left the OR to go to the C-section recovery area. On the way, they stopped by the waiting room to see Ms. Gayle and L. They continued on to the recovery room to wait for me.

I was stitched, transferred to a gurney, and taken to recovery. This part is all really fuzzy, but I was well-cared for in the recovery area. I was able to bond with Joe and feed him for the first time. I was transferred to my postpartum room at around 1:30 AM on 3/1. Joe spent some time in the nursery and he came to us around 3:00 AM. At last, our little family was all together. Exhausted and happy. 

Happy dad and son.

Our care at the hospital was very good. Joe had a pediatric nurse, and I had a postpartum nurse for each shift. Recovery went pretty well, and Joe and I eventually got the hang of feeding. I was really grateful for the help from the hospital staff. The stay flew by, and by Sunday we were ready to go home. We have all made it through the first week and a half, and we are so happy to have baby Joe in our family. He really is a fantastic baby. He gets fussy for about an hour each day, but otherwise he sleeps great and is eating well. At his first pediatric appointment on Tuesday 3/5, Dr. E noted he had gained back 4 oz., and he is doing very well.

Revival.

In an effort to keep distant family and friends updated on our new family member, I'm reviving the blog. I'll be posting pictures, growth updates, thoughts on pregnancy and parenthood, and probably occasional rants and raves. I'll put stuff on facebook occasionally, but look for more comprehensive Baby Joe information here. Much love. -m

2 months in.

Hey, y'all. Looks like today's April 29th, so that means we've been married a whole two months! Go us! If you haven't seen the wedding pictures yet, they're on facebook, or you can go here to our photographer's site. Turns out being married is not very different than cohabiting. (Cohabitating or cohabiting? The first seems right, but the red squiggly is there. We have to trust the red squiggly in these times, yes?). We just have better jewelry. We had thought of having a celebratory party in Houston, but it just seems like a lot of effort. That's mostly why we didn't have a wedding in the first place. We will still have random gatherings of friends in our house, but again, whittling down a guest list to a manageable size is just something we can't do. We suck at things.

We honeymooned in Mexico from March 1-6. I totally recommend the El Dorado Royale to anyone. The food was incredible. I really didn't take many pictures, but the website does the grounds justice.

Clay's mom had a party for us in Vidalia, LA last weekend. My parents flew south for the occasion, and they were indoctrinated into the finest of Louisiana cultural traditions -- the crawfish boil (No. You cannot trust the red squiggly. There is a red squiggly under crawfish. The red squiggly is bullshit).We really enjoyed visiting w/ everyone and filling our bellies with crawfish, cake, and other delectables. Pictures are all over facebook, so I'm not going to repost them here.

Mostly, the last two months have been pretty domestic. We redid part of our fence (the crappy side that Nina rammed with her head and ended up in the neighbor's yard), tilled and sodded the back yard, planted some fruit trees and the herb garden. (God, this blog is thrilling...I swear I'll do something exciting and tell you about it soon.) Liz hooked me up with the Woodduck Farm CSA, and it's been awesome. I guess that's why I haven't been blogging. I've been cooking away my free time.

We did fulfill one promise to ourselves and upgraded the boat. Well, that was more Clay than me, but I'm generally supportive of the idea. Our current boat can hold four, but only two can fish. The new boat can hold 4 to 6 comfortably for fishing, and it can go in the bays (or the Gulf on a calm day). I'll post a picture when I get one. It's still at the dealership, as our old boat is still in the driveway. So, another plea. Visit us. We'll take you fishing.

Married.

We started off our wedding day with a drive to Brenham. On the way, we stopped for a tasty breakfast at Chappell Hill Cafe. It's about half way between Houston and Austin. We both got properly caffeinated and full bellies for less than $12. The sign looked really cool by these clouds.

I got my hair done at a day spa in Brenham by a race car driver named Lindsey. She was a trip. Clay came along, and the spa people gave him some beer while he waited. (This is our kind of day spa.) After an hour, an entire pack of bobby pins, and a half a can of hair spray, we were set to move on to the B&B.

Clay and I stated simple vows in front of a rustic shed at Murski Homestead Bed and Breakfast at 2:00 PM on February 29, 2012. While witnesses in Texas aren't mandatory, our wedding was attended by Pamela, the owner of the B&B and Zach, our photographer. Steve, another B&B owner, officiated the ceremony. After the ceremony, we walked the grounds for a bit, avoiding cow pies when possible. We didn't take too many photos of our own, since Zach's a professional and all. We did ask him to take one with my phone so you could see us now.

We did have a champagne toast and a wedding (cheese)cake that was honestly the finest cheesecake that I've ever had. She put our tiny wooden us (see previous blog) on top of it. We had a wonderful dinner of brisket, ribs, beans, mac & cheese, and cole slaw. And more wine and champagne. We were both incredibly calm all day. And happy.

It was an absolutely perfect day. We promise to follow up with more pictures in the next few weeks. Thank you to our families and friends for letting us run off and do this. We love you.

Last name.

This one isn't an easy one to write. Not because it was a difficult decision, but because I know there's sometimes pretty harsh judgment with this particular choice. It's an intensely personal one, and this is a pretty public way to go about distributing the information. I'm putting it out there in hopes of explaining why I chose to go this route, and I hope you understand. Here goes...

I'm not changing my name when we get married.

Here are a few random points, in no particular order, to explain where my head's at.

1) I'm totally supportive of anyone who chooses to change their name whether they are getting married or not (e.g., if they decide they want to be officially recognized as Miley instead of Destiny). Your name is your own thing to change or keep as you wish.

2) This won't make me any less part of the (hislastname) clan. I feel like I've been part of their family without a ring or a name change for the last five years anyway.

3) Clay's supportive of this choice. He said, "It's your choice; it's your name." (Reason #459 why I love this man.)

4) Our hypothetical offspring will totally have his last name, just like the bitches do. (Although, I gotta say, my ass was pretty chapped when the vet arbitrarily changed Miss Claire's last name to hislastname a few years ago. I got over it. Nina has always been a hislastname.)

5) I won't get offended if people assume I changed it. I'll correct them, but I won't be mad or anything. It's a common thing to do, and I realize I'm in the minority.

So there it is. I hope you understand.